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| Our protagonist plays a carbon fiber violin. |
Reika always had a strange feeling before she went onstage to play, but when she got out there, the sound of her violin covered everything else and she could forget where she was. It was always a shock to her to hear the applause afterwards. Today, she had the feeling again, but it was stronger. She'd heard a guy before her play so well, she wasn't sure she would get first place. She didn't want to come in first, but she had to. Otherwise, she would have failed. So, Reika paced backstage. She went to the dressing room that no one had wanted to share with her and picked up her violin. The feeling came over her in a wave.
Reika almost dropped her violin. She set it on the table, but the feeling wouldn't stop. Reika's hands and knees began shaking. In her beautiful dress, Reika sat down on the floor and scooted herself into the corner. She pulled her knees up to her chin and wrapped her arms around them tightly. Everything else fell away as her heart hammered in her chest and she tried to stop shaking. At some point, one of the handlers came to her room to tell her to get ready. He was shocked to see her on the floor.
"I can't," Reika told him. When he didn't seem to understand, she kept repeating it. After a little while, he left and Reika got herself to stop repeating it. Other handlers came, but all she could tell them was, "I can't."
Eventually, they stopped coming and Reika put her face on her forearms. They'd given up on her. She hadn't played, so she wouldn't even place. She was an even bigger failure than she thought. Reika sat there and sobbed.
"Excuse me," a guy said. Reika looked up. He was the guy she was sure would beat her. He was holding a box of tissues and a basket of chocolate. "Do you want these?"
Reika nodded and the guy set them on the ground near her. Reika expected him to leave, but he sat on the floor next to her, dirtying his tux. Reika managed to uncurl one of her arms to take a tissue and start mopping off her face and neck. She was sure her makeup was everywhere.
"I'm Michael," the boy said after a moment.
"Reika," she replied, as if they both didn't already know the other's name.
"We took my dog for a walk the other day," Michael began. He didn't say a word about finding Reika, champion of violin, in tears. He didn't mention her disarray. He talked about a silly thing his dog had done the other day. When that story was done, he had more. Eventually, Reika had uncurled herself and was eating some of the chocolate.
The backstage announcement came on that they would be announcing the winners soon.
"Oh," Michael said.
"Go on," Reika told him. "Good luck!"
Michael stood up and offered her a hand to help her. "Thank you, Reika." He smiled and hurried out the door. Reika packed up her violin, changed, and slid out the back door. She was gone like a ghost.
*
It had been months since her breakdown and Reika still hadn't touched her violin. She wasn't sure she would ever play again. She was living with her friend in a lovely apartment near a picturesque park. It should have been the perfect place to convalesce. Reika found herself taking lone walks in the park every day. She knew her friend expected her to get over it and move on with her life soon. Reika wasn't sure how.
One day, Reika discovered a fish pond. It wasn't on the trail she had been using, but Reika cut across to sit next to it. There had been a trail closed every time she had come here and it must have connected to the pond. She couldn't understand why it was closed. The koi in the pond were beautiful and Reika soon lost herself watching them swim. Then, the surface of the water broke and suddenly, the fish were converging. Reika looked up to see who had thrown something in the pond.
"Hi," Michael said, embarrassed. He was wearing a suit and carrying his violin.
"Hi," Reika replied.
"Can I come sit with you?" Michael asked, throwing the rest of the fish food.
Reika nodded and Michael sat down.
"I never really thanked you for...before," Reika said.
Michael shook his head. "Don't worry about it. You needed to forget what was happening to you for awhile. I was happy to help."
Reika smiled. She noticed he was wearing a crab pin on the lapel of his suit. "So, are you playing for Fae, then?" Fae was one of the big shots and any musician worth their salt would die to play for her. Yet, it was strange, she rarely kept a musician in residence, although she always seemed to want one.
Michael's smile turned bitter. "Yes. I'm her resident violinist."
"Congratulations," Reika replied, surprised that she wasn't jealous. But she had given up those dreams.
"I'm not sure that's the word I would use," Michael replied, looking a little pained. "But how are you? What have you been up to?"
Reika gave a small laugh. "Not much," she confessed. "I haven't touched my violin since that day."
"Really?" Michael asked. He looked down at his violin. "I suppose you don't want to play mine?"
Reika thought about it for a moment, then shook her head. She probably sounded horrible after so long away from it. She cast about for something else to talk about. "How did you get over here? The path to this place must be closed. I cut across a trail."
"Ah." Michael looked a little pained again. "Fae has taken to eating her lunch out here every day and she doesn't like sharing the space."
"And you're her music?" Reika guessed.
Michael nodded.
Reika looked at him. "Do you want to talk about how bad it is? Because it looks like it's bad."
Michael looked at the koi for a moment. "I'm in an exclusive contract," he said, "and I can't break it. Only Fae can."
"Oh." Reika didn't think it would be polite to tell him that was stupid. A musician as talented as Michael could play anywhere in the world he wanted to.
"I know it's stupid. I just thought about how lucky I was and I didn't really read it."
"Can you get a lawyer?" Reika asked.
"Where?" Michael asked. "No one will go against Fae in this town and even if I got a lawyer from somewhere else, I'm sure she'd charm her way out of it."
"Or pressure them," Reika added contemplatively.
Michael laughed. "Now you're getting it." He looked at his watch. "You'd better go. Fae will be here soon and she won't like to see anyone else in her private spot."
"Will you be here again tomorrow?" Reika asked impulsively.
Michael looked surprised. "Yes."
"Then I'll see you tomorrow." Reika got up and walked away before she could say anything else.
*
Reika met Michael at the koi pond every day for several weeks. Fae never seemed to tire of eating lunch there and Reika was glad to talk to someone like Michael. He understood how the violin could become your life and how it could consume you. He was also sympathetic about how Reika never wanted to play again after her breakdown.
They talked about everything. Reika kept bringing him ideas for how to get out of his contract with Fae, but none of them worked. Reika grew to hate the crab in his lapel, marking him as Fae's. Reika knew they couldn't keep meeting out here forever and one chilly autumn day, she showed up at the koi pond, but Michael never did. Reika knew it must have just gotten too cold for Fae to eat outside anymore, but she was worried. Still, what could she do? Michael would have to get Fae to break his contract.
A few weeks later, Reika was invited to a symphonic dinner. She took her roommate along and enjoyed introducing her to old friends. However, one of the friends Reika saw at this dinner was Michael. He looked awful. Reika managed to get a few words with him but only polite nonsense. She had to lean forward to hear Michael, his words were so quiet. When they filed in for the concert, Reika was quiet and she only listened with half an ear. Something had to be done and she didn't like it.
That night, Reika opened up her violin case. Her violin was still in good shape, although the strings had all gone flat. Reika slid her bow across her rosin. She shivered. Then she reminded herself that it had to be done. Slowly, she tuned her violin.
Her roommate stuck her head in the door. "Oh, playing again?"
"Yeah," Reika said, trying not to let her voice quaver. "I think so."
Every day, Reika pushed down her anxiety and fear and played. She knew this wasn't the right way to solve her problems with the violin, but she didn't have time to do it the right way She practiced as hard as she ever had. She had to play better than Michael and that would be no easy task. She was glad she hadn't lost her calluses yet.
Finally, her playing was up to par, but Reika wasn't sure she was ready. Everything she'd had on the line before was just for herself. Now, she was playing for Michael. Reika took a deep breath and made a phone call.
"Yes, I wanted to play a recital to announce that I'm coming back." She tried to sound excited when she said it. Reika tried to sound that way when she arranged everything for her recital. Her pianist was thrilled at how Reika sounded in rehearsal. Reika tried to share her enthusiasm.
Finally, the day came. Reika was using a stage at a local college. She peered out into the audience. Sure enough, Fae was there and she had brought Michael along, perhaps as a lesson to him. Or to Reika. Reika gulped and took a few deep breaths. She could do this. No one out there would matter once she started playing.
Reika looked at her accompanist. She nodded. Reika put on a smile and walked out on the stage. The applause was deafening, but Reika tried not to hear it. She walked to the middle of the stage and gave a bow. Her pianist slid onstage in her wake and sat down. Reika checked the tuning of her violin, knowing it held its pitch well, and nodded at the pianist. Reika took a deep breath, raised her bow up high, and began.
She played for herself and all the joy she thought she'd lost in her music. She played for the anxiety and fear she'd been repressing for so long. She played for Michael to show him it hadn't been a waste to comfort that sobbing girl. Reika played and played until the recital was over. After she lowered her bow, there was a stunned silence for a moment. Then the place exploded with applause. Everyone was standing up. Reika, exhausted, smiled and bowed several times. Eventually, she made her escape offstage and stayed there. However, that was the easy part.
Reika went back to her green room and downed a bottle of water. She carefully put her violin away and wiped it down. It took a little longer than she had expected, but finally Fae barged in with Michael in tow.
"What a triumph," Fae declared. "Back from the dead! My dear, you sounded better tonight than you've ever sounded!"
"Thank you," Reika said.
"But surely you don't mean to play alone. The world can be a difficult place for a musician all on their own. You need a protector."
This was going faster than Reika had anticipated. "A protector?" she asked.
"My dear. I can get you into any concert hall you can imagine. Any fancy dinner party. Anywhere. All you have to do is sign a contract to be my musician in residence."
Reika had to admit, the bait was good. "I thought you already had a musician in residence."
Fae looked at Michael. "Oh yes. Surely you two know each other. I could have some simply divine violin duets written up for the two of you."
"I'm afraid not," Reika said with a frown. "I work alone."
"Excuse me?" Fae asked, not used to being told no.
"If you want me as your artist in residence, you've got to break Michael's contract."
Michael's eyes went wide. "No!" he said.
"Hush, Michael," Fae said, her eyes still on Reika. "So, little miss has outgrown her days of following the rules, has she?"
"I've never worked well with others," Reika said. "They're stifling. That's why I worked hard to win so many contests. Can you imagine someone with my talent and skill being concert mistress instead of featured soloist?" Reika had practiced this speech and she hoped it sounded as convincing here as it had in her bathroom.
"I see," Fae said. "Well, I shall have to think on your offer. Don't let my generous offer go to waste, my dear."
"I want to see how it stacks up against the others," Reika replied blandly.
Fae's eyes got bright and her mouth compressed to a thin line. "Excuse me?" she asked.
"I'm sure you're not the only music lover who's having the same idea," Reika said. "I want to see what other offers I get before I sign anything."
Fae drew herself up.
"Good night," Reika said to her, picking up her violin case. She left the green room and headed into the crush of well-wishers, leaving an enraged and dangerous woman behind her.
*
The next day, Fae's lawyer called Reika, hoping to iron out the details of Reika's contract. Reika held firm that her lawyer would have to look it over and that she would not sign it if Michael was still an artist in residence for Fae. "And he'll have to tell me himself that he's been dismissed!" Reika declared.
To her credit, Fae hung on for almost a week before giving in. Reika was sure Michael was looking worse and worse each day and he couldn't be playing up to his potential anymore. Finally, Reika was summoned to Fae's house. Reika went with her heart in her mouth and her violin case in her hand.
Everyone knew where Fae's house was and how grand it was, but Reika had never had to go inside it before. It didn't look like a place where one lived. Reika knocked on the door and a butler showed her in.
"I have decided that it is worth it to dismiss Michael in order to sign you up, Reika," Fae began. Reika was glad she was getting straight to the point.
"Excellent. Can I get it in writing that you are dismissing Michael?"
Fae's eyes narrowed. "Of course, dear."
Reika watched Fae write out the simple sentence and sign it. Reika took the paper and placed it in her violin case. "Excellent. To celebrate, I wondered if you might want to hear some music?"
"Of course," Fae replied.
Reika smiled and got out her violin. She tuned quickly and began to play a solo, a haunting piece. She had meant to make Fae cry, but the old woman wasn't shedding a tear. Reika transitioned into a soft, soothing piece to try to make Fae sleepy. Fae sat up straighter in her chair. Running out of ideas, Reika transitioned into a dance. Fae's foot began tapping. Encouraged, Reika began to play faster and louder. Fae was tapping both feet. Reika began to walk around the room as she played. Fae stood up and began to dance, just a little. Reika repeated the tune and sped it up. Fae began to dance in earnest. Reika played faster and faster and began to move toward the door. Fae twirled across the room.
Michael slid in the door behind Reika and darted forward to grab Reika's violin case. Then the two of them ran from the room, Reika stopping the tune only once they slammed the door behind them. She had gotten out of there without signing anything. It had worked. They didn't have time to put Reika's violin away, so they ran into the street carrying everything. They didn't stop until they were a block away from Fae's house.
"You really did it," Michael said in wonder. "I feel like a huge weight's been lifted off of my shoulders."
"You're welcome," Reika replied, putting her violin safely into its case. "I had to pay you back."
"You've done that many times over," he said.
Reika smiled and they started walking.
"So," Michael began, "did you really mean that you didn't want to play any duets?"
Reika shrugged, thinking that if she needed to play more, she would probably need to start therapy. "Depends on who I'm playing with. Why?"
"I was just thinking two all-star violinists have twice the appeal of one."
Reika laughed. "What makes you think I'm coming out of retriement?"
"Retirement? Already?" Michael scoffed. "Music runs through your veins, Reika. Even if you stop getting paid, you'll never stop playing."
Reika looked at her violin case and considered. "You know, a duet might not be such a bad idea." She looked up at Michael. "Only, you've got to take that crab off."
Michael looked down at his coat. "I forgot that thing was still there." Quickly, he unclipped it from his coat and tossed it into a garbage can.
"Perfect. Now, I might consider a duet with you."
Michael laughed and Reika wondered at how much more her life would change now that she was confronting her problems. Hopefully it would all be for the better.
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